God's Attitude Toward #Divorce - What does the Bible say?

God’s attitude about divorce is not a mystery. He is clear in His Word on repeated occasions. Now, whether we want to hear His perspective is another matter. Christians must hear Him.

Marriage relationships get very tangled, messy, and difficult. And the amount of time we live together in a marriage relationship is more than any other earthly relationship. So, it is all encompassing. The minor irritations become nonstop ones. The major issues become extremely difficult – and without Christ, even impossible. Yes, marriage takes work for everyone. Yes, we need to work all the time to make marriage work well. And that is emotionally draining.

There are many factors that go into making marriage difficult. Spouses that don’t care. Spouses that aren’t there. Spouses that don’t have the same goals or don’t even have spiritual life. There are other occasions where separation is essential. A spouse may have very ill motives or aspirations toward another. So how can you stick with it? Well, let’s begin by understanding God’s perspective on marriage and divorce. Let’s be clear about where God stands on this issue.

1. God intended marriage to be an unbreakable union.

In Genesis 2:24, God sets up the design for marriage. This is how God desired humanity to organize themselves. Ideally, a man marries a woman, they leave the parents’ and form a new entity.

“For this reason, a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24).

The word be joined is a very strong word. They shall cleave together. Like scales on an alligator, these two cannot be ripped apart without pain, blood and perhaps death. The original intent for marriage is a permanent bond till death. When two pieces of wood are glued together with the right glue, there is such a permanent bond that if you try to tear them apart, both pieces of wood break. This is the marriage bond. If someone tries to rip it apart, people break.

2. God’s Gospel intent for marriage.

Perhaps even more importantly, the marriage bond pictures the bond of Christ and the church. If that bond is permanent, so must our marriage vow be permanent. The marriage relationship was made to picture this beautiful spiritual relationship and as we show the world a loving, husband, wife marriage partnership that is permanent, we picture a loving Christ and church relationship which is permanent.

“for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. 32This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church (Ephesians 5:31-32).

3. Marriage is a covenant and covenants are permanent.

Our word is our bond. And yet, today, people often break their promises. The covenant is a heightened promise, a vow. As we vow fidelity before God and witnesses in a marriage ceremony, we must fulfil that promise.

“Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant” (Malachi 2:14).

4. God hates divorce.

The Bible cannot get clearer than that.

“For I hate divorce,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, “and him who covers his garment with wrong,” says the Lord of hosts. “So take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously” (Malachi 2:16).

We never want to do anything that God hates. Whether or not the marriage is “working out” we cannot do something God hates. We must work at working out what we have promised.

5. Is it ever right to kill your spouse?

What a question! Why would you say such a thing!? I agree! That should be our same response to the question should someone divorce their spouse. There is harm, covenant-breaking, committing something God hates… all wrapped up in that word divorce. That should repulse us as killing. And yet there may be a time, if a spouse goes crazy and is coming after your children with a knife that you need to intervene physically… But why would we even entertain such exceptions? Divorce should not be in the vocabulary of a Christian spouse, just as killing should not be in the vocabulary of a Christian spouse. But there might be an exception.

So, please don’t start with the exception clause of the Bible. Start with God’s stated perspective on divorce. He hates it. There may be somethings He hates worse. That’s for another study. For now. Just make sure you are careful before you make this promise – “till death do us part.” And if you have made the promise. Keep it. For your sake, the Lord’s sake, and your spouses sake.